when the human nature takes control.. Please remind me that...

2006-05-22T23:13:00.000+08:00

All to Jesus I surrender
All to Him I freely give
I will ever love and trust Him
In His presence daily live

I surrender all
I surrender all
All to Jesus I surrender
I surrender all

All to Jesus I surrender
Make me, Savior, wholly Thine
Let me feel Your Holy Spirit
Truly know that Thou art mine

All to Jesus I surrender
Lord I give myself to Thee
Fill me with Thy love and power
Let Thy blessings fall on me

This song never fails to bring tears to my eyes..
At times... Tears of Sadness.
Yet some times... Tears of Joy.
But Many Times... Tears from a tired being.
As this song is often sung during service... i can't help but tell the Lord..
"Your will be done"

Even as i listen to this song now..
i marvel at the beautiful words Judson W. Van Deventer had penned down.
I'm sure it must have been when Judson was facing difficult times, that the Lord inspired him.
And till this day, this song is such an inspiration to many, especially to those needy and tired, like me.

I ask myself, why am i so tired..
I ask myself, are the things i'm chasing for, in accordance to God's word..
Most importantly, i ask myself.. "Jon, have you placed eveything, yes, EVERYTHING at the feet of Jesus?"
At times, i feel i have.. yet at times, don't.
But if i have truly done so.. won't it be a definite Yes at all times?

So what does it take to let go?
Yes, it takes a willing heart.
Yes, it takes a submissive heart..
but more importantly, it takes a faithful heart.
A Heart wanting to place itself into the loving hands of the Father...

Above all, a faithful heart with the desire to put all pride away and let the Father take control.
A Faithful heart believing that the Lord makes NO mistakes.

Have i done that?
Well, at times.. but many times no.
Do i want to do that?
Yes.

Why?
Because, It is only when we fully submit to the Lord that blessings will be bestowed upon us.
Why so?
Because when we are walking and living according to His will..
He as our loving Father would give His Best to His children.

Dear Lord,
even as i face trials in life..
i know you listen.
For father, you are ever loving, merciful and bountiful in your ways.
So Father, remind me that i'm human.. and needy human i will ever be.
Lord, you know the struggles i'm facing.
Lord, you know the testings of faith you've placed me in.
Most importantly, Lord, You know Everything.
So Father God, help me not to be stubborn in my ways.
Remove this pride in me..
And to entrust everything to you.
Yes,
the feelings,
the relationships,
the friendships,
things of the past,
thngs of the present
and things of the future.
Things i know, and even don't.
Help me to live by your word..
Remind me dear God, that You know Best for your Child.
God, i cry out to you, for only you understand.
Remind me to run to you when i'm down..
Remind me to turn to you when i'm lonely.
Remind me to talk to you when i'm facing problems in life.
Remind me.. Remind me, Dear Lord.
You are all Sufficient.. You are all i need.
Yes Lord, there will be times i wish someone, anyone ...
would just message me reminding me i'm not alone.
But God, help me remember that i can talk to you anytime, anywhere,
and that you want to talk and walk with me too.
Help me to cherish everything you've given to me..
Above all, Help me to treasure You even more.

Your Son,
Jon

2006-05-14T20:50:00.000+08:00

Love

Love.. what does it require?
Love.. just a plain feeling?
Love.. a great commitment indeed!

Love.. i look into His eyes and find no other..
Love.. as perfect and whole as His!

Love.. there's so much i need to learn...
Love.. keep me pure and clean!

Love.. i know there's someone in store for me...
Love.. make me wait patiently!

Love.. Jesus shall be my only example...
Love.. no where will there be another example!

Love.. the very reason why a Great King came in humility...
Love.. teach me to walk just as the Son of God did!

Love.. make me whole in You...
Love.. make me walk with Him daily!

Love.. renew, change, restore and purify me...
Love.. may i find my perfect rest in thee!

2006-05-12T23:47:00.000+08:00

Just a random entry here..
after the last one ..
which is really outdated. =)

SERVICE BECOMING A DIS-SERVICE?

Have you ever wondered whether how much is too much?
Yes.. it does exist in our every day living..
even in our service to God.
Is there such thing as doing too much that "service to God becomes a disservice?

it took a a painful lesson to teach me this...
and it took someone i hold dear and close to my heart,
to really wake me up on this truth.

Have i been doing too much, i wonder..
is serving God in a number of ministries a down side to my christian walk?
i guess... ive found the answer.
and the answer was all along there...
i just did not take hid to it.

i did not take heed to the fatigue level i was going through..
i did not even take heed to my friends advice..
and to feel burnt out, was the end result.
to stumble those around me..
instead of building them up..
was the fruit of all that ive done.

perhaps i did take things upon myself..
thinking that if i did just one thing more..
those around me would be inspired..
but boy , was i wrong.

it could have been that way..
but i simply took too much on my tiny shoulders..
all these..
i had to bear..
and to face that particular misunderstanding
was perhaps the final blow,
telling me to wake up or suffer at the work of my own hands.

2006-01-25T23:47:00.000+08:00

25th January 2006

Just got back from the vigil service of Uncle Vincent..
Was telling dad how much I respect Uncle Vincent and how good a man he was.
Elder Vincent whom I regard as an uncle..
Was a close family pal.

A man of God,
A Gift from heaven..
A man sincere..
Whose service had no limits.

I marvel at how Uncle Vincent had so loved my family
Still remember how when I was young, and when Josiah and I were still small in size,
That Uncle Vincent would always fetch my family and I home upon every opportunity he had.
Still remember, how one night, when my whole family was locked out of our home
That Uncle Vincent and Uncle Lap Ki came over to help saw open the lock..
Still remember how once when Uncle Vincent saw my injured leg,
Brought me to the doctor and even paid for every penny.
Still remember how whenever my house computer was down…
That Uncle Vincent would take the trouble to come down to fix the bugs
Even though it had meant traveling all the way from Thomson to the West.
To think of it.. the very computer I’m using to type now had been repaired by him before..
Still remember how Uncle Vincent jokingly calls my mum by the term “mai Kia”
Which simply means young women..
All these and more… Uncle Vincent was a good man indeed.

A man, I will always remember, that’s how much he means to me.
But apart from all these kind gestures..
I thank God truly for how he had been an inspiration in my walk with God.
I thank God for how he was always there to advice, encourage and guide..
I thank God for Uncle Vincent’s testimony and how he taught me what it meant to love others in as much as you love yourself.

To think that I had wanted to meet him up for coffee..
Now, I’ll only be able to do it when I get to see him at the great heavenly feast..

We will never ever be able to comprehend why God had taken back to His side our dear Uncle Vincent..
We will never ever understand why this was so sudden to the Tan family..
But I guess.. one day, all these answers will be told…

How I long for that day to come..
When I will be able to see my dear Uncle Vincent face to face..
And tell him how much he had made an impact to me..
For now, I will just have to live my life… like how Uncle Vincent had lived his..
Striving for the best..
Helping with his best..
Taking the heavenly test..
And passing it without regret.

Till I see my dear Uncle Vincent again..
May God’s love and grace be upon his bereaved family..
May they be comforted so sweetly through God’s word..That Uncle Vincent had fought the good fight and is now in heaven eternity.

2006-01-13T22:59:00.000+08:00

1 Corinthians 13:1-13
If I speak in the tongues of men and angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a tinkling symbol.

And if I have prophecy and know all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.

And if I dole out all my goods, and if I deliver my body that I may boast but have not love, nothing I am profited.

Love is long suffering, love is kind, it is not jealous, love does not boast, it is not inflated.

It is not discourteous, it is not selfish, it is not irritable, it does not enumerate the evil.It does not rejoice over the wrong, but rejoices in the truth

It covers all things, it has faith for all things, it hopes in all things, it endures in all things.

Love never falls in ruins; but whether prophecies, they will be abolished; or tongues, they will cease; or knowledge, it will be superseded.

For we know in part and we prophecy in part.

But when the perfect comes, the imperfect will be superseded.

When I was an infant, I spoke as an infant, I reckoned as an infant;
when I became [an adult], I abolished the things of the infant.

For now we see through a mirror in an enigma, but then face to face. Now I know in part, but then I shall know as also I was fully known.

But now remains faith, hope, love,
these three;
but the greatest of these is love.

2006-01-03T09:23:00.000+08:00

Year 2005 has come to an end.. So fulfiling yet so fast.. 2005 i bid thee farewell for here comes 2006.

I truly thank You my God for year 2005. The struggles i had gone through, the testings of faith.. All these trials.. just proved to me time and time again how You my Lord is indeed faithful and true.

I thank You especially for a relationship that was mended and restored. This friendship i will and always do cherish... How silly was i not to be there when she had followed Your plans. But i truly thank You that all is well now and that You are so graciously blessing this friendship in Your own way, in Your own timing.

Thank You especially for being my Stronghold and Strength, for it is indeed You who has not forsaken me, it is You who calls Yourself Yahweh who has been my counselor, joy giver during those time when i was down, lost, lonely and confused.

Thank You for how You have blessed SS camp 2005 so richly.. Not due to my own contributions nor the works i had done.. but solely because You are and magnificiant in ALL Your ways. You have proved to not only me but everyone yet again that You are who You are.. the Lord and God who Provides.. my Jehovah Jireh.

Year 2006 here i come.. with challanges ahead i shall overcome. All these i commit to You my Lord knowing that You are already there before i even set my footprints on the days ahead. And You and You alone knows what is BEST for me. Teach me Lord to follow what the old traditional chinese word "ting" illustrates on. Help me to have the right "Attitude" towards You and Your people.. Teach me to be a blessing to those around me to show them "Love" especially to those whom i find it so difficult to understand.. Teach me to "listen" more, "listen" more to those who need You, so that as i "listen", You will use me by supplying the right words as i purpose to encourage and draw others closer to You.. Guide me Master to "see and watch" out for those who are stumbling, to point them back to You for You alone understands..

Year 2006, will definitly be a busier year, with so many responsibilities and with the field placement that will be taking place very soon.. Father God, teach me to pray just as You have instructed me to. Instill in me and remind me that prayer is power. When i am down, help me remember through Luke 1:37, that "all things are possible through You".

Year 2006, i dont really know what is in store.. but Lord, continue to be my Best-est Friend.. Make me, mould me, renew me and change me.. Refine me and Sculpt me more and more to be Christlike.. to Love and not hate. To encourage and not discourage... To bless and be a blessing. When i am down, Lift me up. I know that there will be times i will feel lonely.. and the desire to have someone by my side so great.. but God, teach me that no other one or being is so close, good and just as You are.

2006, i commit to Your hands... LEt the weak indeed say that they are strong.. LEt the poor confidently say that they are rich.. Let the blind boldly proclaim and say that they can see.. all because of One.. the sweetest name one can ever find.. Yes, You.. Jesus.

When my human nature takes control in Year 2006, remind me that You are Soverign, Faithful, Loving, and simply... My Best Friend.

2005-11-06T00:18:00.000+08:00

A letter to God

Dear God..
You have said that when we come to You in prayer..
You'll answer.
Father God, You alone know the struggles i am going through..
You alone know the challanges ahead of me..
God.. You have said that You will deliver those who have COMPLETE trust in You..
Father God... many a times... i've fallen.
I've fallen out of Your grace...
i have not lived up to what You have commanded me to do..
Instead i have hurt You through my words, throughts and actions.
I have not been a good friend to those around me..
i have not been a true lighthouse for Thee...

Dear God... change, renew and mould me..
You know how i feel.
All these... i cannot hide from thee.
the hurt.. the tears.. the anguish..
the disappointment.. the worries and doubts my heart has.
I pray that You will constantly remind me..
that You and You alone is in control.

Father.. many a times.. i have done things my way.
my selfish and proud ways..
and what happened today.. was an utter disgrace.
yes.. a disgrace to my faith.. to Your name.

Yahweh.. You have called me to Your side..
You have taken me under Your heavenly wings..
but Your child here... has failed You..
Your son here has grieved You deeply.
my heart breaks.. my heart cries..
for Your touch again.
please be my guide..
please be the only reason i am living for..
teach me how to love Thee.
teach me how to live a life acceptable and well pleasing to Thee
How to keep the vows i have promised to Thee.
Instill.. revive my heart again...
mend my broken heart...
uplift my fallen spirit..
so that i shall once again say..
that in You..
i shall have the victory..

Your prodigal son..
Jon.

When my human nature takes control...
Please remind me that..
You are the key to my problems..
You alone... knows what is best for me.

2005-10-23T08:35:00.000+08:00

A prayer...

2005-10-23T08:32:00.000+08:00

A prayer for the sick..
A prayer for the unsaved.

A cry out to my Savior..
As I humbly ask for His grace.

As people pass me by..
May your words supply..

The Love and blessings..
That shall never run dry.

My soul cries out to thee..
That in my trials..
Your presence be strong.

Change, renew, transform me..
Till I see you face to face.

When my Human nature takes control... please remind me that You're Jehovah Rapha.

2005-10-19T23:52:00.000+08:00

WEHOO!!!
i'm back.. after one month of "forgetting" to blog.. am back yet again. =)
this time, its because of two reasons.
Firstly, i've promised my church bud, stan, that i will update the blog less it becomes like the rest of the other "sites" that ended up in silent "endings". Guess, it's good to have pals who "bug" and remind you of tasks you have yet complete.
Secondaly, over the past month.. the Lord has been good, merciful and gracious to me. Thus, if the Lord has blessed, how not to declare!

Well, the Lord has been good and gracious to not only me but the people around and who are close to me. So for today's posting, i'll write on how the Lord has been good to those close to me!

CFC
Firstly, i thank God for seeing my dear-bro colin through 5 weeks of intensive trainign in australia. If you have not known yet, col., is learning to be a pilot! And well, i'm just so excited for him.. seeing how God has paved every obstacle for him reminds me that when we are sincere with the Lord, He will listen and show us His best ways!

Secondly, i thank God for seeing bro-stan through his Agapella performance at west coast park! Truly, here is a brother who is using his talents for the Lord. Seeing him come back to Galilee was very encouraging AND seeing him serve the Lord with us motivates me to want to continue serve the Lord in whatever small capacities i can!

Thirdly, please continue to pray for bro-ben. Last heard was that he went overseas for a business trip. BIG BENANA has been blessed by the Lord with a good job and i pray that God will use Ben mightly!

Family
There are so much to thank God for. So much gratitude in my heart that words alone can never express. God has been in control of this family of mine. God almighty has been the provider and supplier of our every needs, and great God will continue to use this family as a mighty lighthouse in this darken world.
I thank God for the messages my dad has been preaching lately. Somehow, i realize that dad's preaching technique has changed. He is using more life applications and is trying his best to deliver messages that are simple to understand yet speak of the truth from God's word. I really marvel at how the Lord is using dad in Galilee and well, dad has been one of the main inspirations for me to want to give my best to the Lord.
Mum. Mummy's school concert is nearing!! Another great time to see kids putting on concert items. But dear oh mummy has not been having a good time at work. Been facing alot of stress lately and some nasty remarks have been thrown at her. I Just pray that God will give her the peace that PASSETH ALL UNDERSTANDING, so that she will be able to find her confidance in the Lord.
Josiah. Thank God for seeign him through BMT. How time flies man! two months just flew past! And before you know it, didi is now in OETI-Ayer Rajah trainign to be a vehicle technician. I pray that Jesus will teach josiah to be a true soldier of God. That bro will be a true testimony of Christ's love despite being in enviroments where temptations are high. Also, please pray for God's will to be done. Bro was offered the overseas posting form and well, he does seem very interested to want to be posted in outer lands. Pray that Josiah will committ everythign to God for Yahweh knows Best!

Well, these are just some of the people i consider close to me. all serve as inspirations and motivations for me in my walk with Christ. The Lord has been real good to each of them! And i'm sure HE'll continue to be!

When my human nature takes control... please remind me that You are a GREAT God who cares!

2005-09-18T22:00:00.001+08:00

Oh the sins of man!
Have you ever wondered, why man and all men, sin? Have you ever taken a minute to ask yourself if things would be different if Adam and Eve had not taken the tempting fruit that God specifically forbided them to? Sometimes i do..

How both man and woman was chased out because of disobediance sometimes make me wonder if God was too harsh.
But such is the cruelty of One man's sin!
History of all histroy changed when the couple in garden of eden bit that fruit. And since then, men have lived in sin. Not one can deny this.
Sometimes we hear of people saying that they have not sinned because they have not committed grevious acts of murder, stealing and cheating. But the very fact that we want more and more, shows our natural state of greed.
Today's message struck me real hard. Why? Because.. although we do not want to be found sinning, we cannot deny the reality that sin will always be close, will always have a grip on us, and sin is simply everywhere.

Children sinful in nature, but Loved by a God who hates sins.
Because of His great Love, He sent His Son.
Before the world begin, you and i were already on His mind.

He bearing the sins on the old rugged cross knew exactly what sin was and because of that, not only did He defeat the evil one once and for all but Has promised us in His word that if we come to Him in contrite and prayerful hearts He is always willing to forgive, cleanse and renew our spirits in Him.
Today's entry might seem sombre, but i'm grateful that such a message was preached. For sometime now, i've been struggling with sin and will always be. I pray and hope that whatever i've learnt today would certainly be a reminder for me to always be accountable for my spiritual state.

In Him i trust, though Him i shall have the victory!

This week will be hectic. Exams, Essays, Jounrals, Camps... All these will require me to practice my simple faith in Him but i'm glad that He'll always be there for me.

When the human nature take's control.. please remind me that...
tho' YOU hated sin, it was by your grace and through my faith that i'm able to see the Light.

2005-09-18T22:00:00.000+08:00

2005-09-17T00:52:00.000+08:00

Well, one must ask..
"Jon, what are you here for? Why have you decided yet again to open another blog?"
i guess.. sometimes, it's time to just start things anew.. you know, give life a new perspective.. give yourself another opportunity to go on with life with a new motto and goal.
Yes, i've set up alot of blogs.. first one was at xanga, altrujon@xanga.com .. then went on to create some websites "geocities.com/illusioni_del_jonz" than to a couple forgotten sites and to my last one at jonlk137@blogspot.com but all these as time went by just went into "natural death".
I wonder... if i seriously did lack the discipline to pen down all my thoughts, had laziness taken control over my life.. has sin and temptations bid to sway? Well.. the answer is yes. I've certainly been distracted. Outwardly, i might seem as someone strong, someone who is discipline, but i knew.. that i could not deceive myself at all.
So, why? Why another blog? well.. let's term it another "hope, another chance.. another fire, another desire. "
what will be different in this blog though, is it's intentions to want to glorify and maginify God.
Sometimes, i wonder too.. "Have I Done My Best For Jesus? " Thats' something i've failed in. I've failed to glorify God to give all praise and honour for all the things He has done for me. Christ has certianly paid for my sins. Jesus has certianly conquered death, Yahweh has truly been my best friend, but what have i done for Him?
I pray that with this new blog.. all my dedications will be unto the Lord Most High.
I desire and pray that even in my times of distress and failures, through this blog, i will be able to reflect and pen down my thoughts, and thank Him for those trials that will come my way.

What has He done for me...PLENTY!